do not evacuate the building – this only a test

“do not evacuate the building – this only a test”. That is what would come over the PA in the brown building in east perth in a Scottish accent around ten am on Wednesdays or thereabouts.

so my car went missing today – i parked it on Sunday in the usual spot – have done for three months – but it’s not there now. they say you don’t know what you’ve got til its gone – well they said the world was flat – but no, i don’t miss it (yet) it was an exercise in parking ain’t free (i should [not] point out that the spell checker forced me to include an apostrophe in a number of places) and just in case you think i’m less than two cents in the dollar the consensus (it looks like i spelled that right) of the mental health experts is that i’m ‘malingering’ as if there is a malingering bone in my skeletal frame – but let us not get hung up in semantics.

so no – i don’t miss the car – but there were stolen goods in the boot – well when i say stolen i mean that if the car was stolen then there is a follow on effect to the goods thus inscribed – in particular, a guitar and an amp, and a socket set that survived Sherlock river (but that’s another story) – so to cut a long story short – mediocrity – if you can be mediocre you can succeed in a civilized version of life.

so ‘do not evacuate the building – this only a test’

p.s. i also had to capitalize (with z’s) a lot of proper nouns to satisfy the spell checker – language – who needs it? – and people still go hungry! wtf! someone has outwitted themselves

The one armed lesbian dwarf thrower

[Mary Magdala and Jesus the Nazarene sit under a tree, sharing a joint]

Maggie: What was with that quip you gave to Judah, about the poor?
Joshua: What quip?
Mary: You know, “the poor you have with you always”.
Yeshua: Hmm? Good god! Did I say that?
Magdala: Yep?
Jesus: Holy great grandmother’s chest hair? I’m screwed!
Magdala: What!?!
Chippie: I’ve just circumvented my main agenda! Why oh why are you so good with feet?
Maggie: You’ve lost me.
bar-?: That foot rub beguiled me. My whole body was in heaven!
Maria: I am well glad, yet still confused.
Jeshua: Ahh bugger it! You are a giver, they are all takers. God knows what a mess they will make of it.
Magdala: Wha?
Jesus: You like Judah. I can tell.
Mary: I used to. Not anymore.
Joshua: You should. He’s wiser than you think.
Maria: I don’t trust him.
bar-?: Trust! Bah humbug! Hey, did you hear the one about the one-armed lesbian dwarf thrower?
Magdala: What?
Jesus: He was gay.

I used to be a Christian and I’m glad I was

(Why you should never throw out the baby with the bathwater, nor as you now do, kill the baby and worship the bathwater.)

(Pourquoi vous devriez ne jamais jeter le bébé avec l’eau du bain, ni comme vous faites maintenant, tuer le bébé et le culte de l’eau du bain.)

J’étais un chrétien et je suis content.

I used to be a Christian and I’m glad I was. Christianity yielded more benefits than less. For example, if I hadn’t been a Christian I would not have encountered so many wonderful people. Especially wonderful were the one’s that had no idea they were wonderful. Sure there was hypocrisy, as there still is now, but less so. But I had always looked for an excuse to choose forgiveness over judgement, and mercy over vengeance (and similar…). And then I encountered Larry Norman, and everything went up a gear.

J’avais l’habitude d’être un chrétien et je suis content. Le christianisme a donné plus d’avantages que de moins. Par exemple, si je n’avais pas été un chrétien, je n’aurais pas rencontré tant de gens merveilleux. Surtout merveilleux ont été les années qui n’avaient aucune idée qu’ils étaient merveilleux. Bien sûr, il a été l’hypocrisie, car il est encore présent, mais moins. Mais j’avais toujours cherché une excuse pour choisir pardon sur le jugement et la miséricorde sur la vengeance (et similaires …). Et puis j’ai rencontré Larry Norman, et tout est allé à la vitesse supérieure.

Now I like my music. In fact I am very much defined by it. So when I heard Larry Norman for the first time, all sorts of bells went off. In spite of my many-splendored and mentally-irregular musical tastes, Larry was like glue to them, reinforcing them. The first live concert I ever attended was a Larry Norman ‘unplugged’ one. That was probably 1979 and it took 20+ years for me to attend my next concert. That was Don McLean and I was so surprised when he sang ‘Crossroads’ as that song had me at 15. A Rickie Lee Jones concert would have been first but, sadly, that concert was cancelled. I still have the ticket somewhere amongst the rubble.

Maintenant, j’aime ma musique. En fait, je suis très défini par elle. Alors quand j’ai entendu Larry Norman pour la première fois, toutes sortes de cloches partit. En dépit de ma colline de l’adieu et mentalement-irréguliers goûts musicaux, Larry était comme de la colle à eux, en les renforçant. Le premier concert live que j’ai jamais assisté a un Normand de Larry débranché ‘un. Cela a probablement été 1979 et il a fallu 20 ans et + pour moi d’assister à mon prochain concert. Ce fut Don McLean et j’ai été tellement surpris quand il a chanté «Crossroads» comme cette chanson m’a eu à 15 ans. Un concert de Rickie Lee Jones aurait été le premier, mais, malheureusement, ce concert a été annulé. J’ai encore le ticket quelque part parmi les décombres.

So Larry reinforced Christianity by reinforcing and re-adjusting my world view. (At this point it is safe to say that Christianity is only readjusted by the dollar – becoming more and more judgement- and vengeance- oriented, rendering unto the Caesars of fear (spawning hatred) and consumption (spawned of the dollar) – such a waste. [ed: better as a footnote? {mind your business!}] (Bracket checker?)

Alors Larry renforcé le christianisme en renforçant et en ré-ajuster ma vision du monde. (A ce stade, il est sûr de dire que le christianisme est seulement réajustée par le dollar – devient jugement et de plus en plus de vengeance orientée vers le rendu des Césars de la peur (la haine de ponte) et de la consommation (engendré du dollar) – un tel des déchets [ndlr:. meilleure en bas de page {l’esprit de votre entreprise!}] (Bracket Checker)?

My world view, my serious world view (you gotta laugh!) it was just that ‘do unto others’ thing, a lot of cheek turning, forgiving and remembering, the stuff that all the other ‘wise’ religions say – the heroic quest – the many-splendored smell of the thing. And here was this Larry Norman guy singing it. Well bless my cotton socks, wrap me up in towels and feed me to the mendicants!, knock me down with a feather and call me Bruce!

Ma vision du monde, ma vision du monde sérieux (! Tu dois rire) c’est juste que «faire à autrui ‘chose, beaucoup de tourner la joue, de pardonner et de se souvenir, les trucs que tous les autres« sages »que les religions disent – la quête héroïque – l’odeur colline de l’adieu de la chose. Et voici ce qu’il Larry Norman gars chantant. Eh bien bénir mes chaussettes en coton, moi de conclure en serviettes et me nourrir aux mendiants!, M’abattre avec une plume et appelez-moi Bruce!

I quit Christianity in 1980 and it took 20+ years to get over it, but I’m over it; over it and glad of it.

J’ai quitté le christianisme en 1980 et il a fallu 20 ans et + pour s’en sortir, mais je suis sur elle; sur elle et heureux.

Now Larry has his detractors, and I wish them healing, for mercy still is better than justice, forgiveness than vengeance et al, so busy measuring darkness, missing the light. There is a bit of me in all of them, so by my will, they are forgiven.

Maintenant, Larry a ses détracteurs, et je leur souhaite la guérison, la miséricorde est toujours mieux que la justice, le pardon à la vengeance et al, tellement occupé à l’obscurité de mesure, la lumière manque. Il ya un peu de moi dans chacun d’eux, donc par ma volonté, ils sont pardonnés.

[I recently discovered I am of French ancestry (circa 14 something) so am including paragraph by paragraph French translation a la google translator, unabridged – make of it what you will – adjust your algorithms accordingly – free faulty – as opposed to fault-free – French tuition]

[J’ai récemment découvert que je suis d’ascendance française (vers 14 quelque chose) je le suis aussi par la traduction, y compris le paragraphe du paragraphe française d’un traducteur de La google, intégrale – en faire ce que vous voulez – ajuster vos algorithmes en conséquence – sans défaut – par opposition à sans faute – les frais de scolarité français]

If this meandering drivel has adjusted your emotion state in any positive way, please check out kiva.org for added warmth. Ditto if the result was negative.

Si ce radotage méandres a ajusté votre état émotion en aucune manière positive, s’il vous plaît consulter kiva.org pour plus de chaleur. Idem si le résultat était négatif.

Peace out law abiding citizen cain abel bayonet.

Citoyen respectueux de la Paix à baïonnette respectueux Cain Abel.

(Which just goes to show how easy it is for things to get lost in translation – lol)

(Qui va juste pour montrer combien il est facile pour des choses à se perdre dans la traduction – lol)

The words of Larry Norman

Larry Norman is a little-known Christian poet and musical genius. While I don’t embrace his faith, I embrace his passion, and consider him a significant influence in my approach to life.

Here are some of his lyrics for your consideration…

i don’t believe in politics
while the masses stay unfed
til the leaders change priorities
and supply the poor with bread
don’t believe in the revolution
or the empty words of peace
you can tear all of the governments down
you still won’t find release

i’ve searched all around the world to find a grain of truth
i’ve opened the mouth of love and found a wisdom tooth

i’ve always heard thou shalt not kill
what are we doing in vietnam?
why do we have the electic chair?
why did we build the neutron bam?
i dont believe in the moonshot
how many millions was that worth?
if you wanna show up the russians
then just feed all the poor on earth

you are far across the ocean
in a war that’s not your own
and while you’re winning theirs
you’re gonna lose the one at home

you say all men are equal all men are brothers
then why are the rich more equal than others
don’t ask me for the answer i’ve only got one
that a man leaves his darkness
when he follows the son

goliath had a sword, david had a stone
i have got the lord so i am not alone
if you knock me down brother
i will not fight you back
coz god loves all his children
red white yellow brown and black

you think it’s such a sad thing
when you see a fallen king
then you find out
they’re only princes to begin with
and everybody has to choose
whether they will win or lose
follow god or sing the blues
and who they’re gonna sin with
what a mess the world is in
i wonder who began it
don’t ask me
i’m only visiting this planet

you could be a brilliant surgeon
or a sweet young virgin
or a harlot out to sell
you could learn to play the blues
or be howard hughes
or the scarlet pimpernell
you could be a french provincial midwife
or go from door to door with a death-knife
but without love you ain’t nothing…

you could be a woman feeler
or a baby stealer
you could drink your life away
or you could be a holy prophet
get a blessing off it
or you could fast for fifty days
you could shake hands with the devil
or give your life to god on the level
but without love you ain’t nothing…

if we could live in shakespeare’s day
i wonder who’d we’d see
if people then could live today
i wonder what we’d see

they’d probably stop a corner cop
and ask what the whole world’s coming to
if people then could live today
i wonder what they’d do
yes i wonder what they’d do

would romeo and juliet
watch nelson eddy kiss jeanette?
would bacchus read police gazette?
and window peep at silhouette?
would ceasar pay to see the mets?
would icarus join the jet set?
would satan smoke menthol cigarettes?
would samson razor with gillettes?

would henry viii use etiquette
in a busy new york luncheonette?
would cleopatra die when when bit?
or save herself with a tourniquet?
would beethoven join a jazz quartet?
would ben hur drive a blue corvette?
would aristotle be an acid head?
would cain kill abel with a bayonet

nothing really changes
everything remains the same
we are what we are
till the day that we die

[amazon asin=B001502LME&template=iframe image]

related links:
the words of larry norman
larrynorman.com
larry norman @ wikipedia

dear god / imaginary entity / …


dear god / imaginary entity / supreme being / yoda / elvis / orson

how’s tricks?

“”

a point of order i’d like to raise

i just want to have it on record – that i’m expecting you expect me to expect to reap what i expected to sow – now that’s not firm ok – i’m just you know like putting it out there – we can talk about it later

“”

then i think its a bug – it’s definitely not an enhancement!

“”

question time? oh alright

yeah as much as can expected in these gloomy times – not lately – no – no – i’d rather be crutching sheep – no – sort of – the code is on drugs – whatever – i guess – tired – to who? – 42 – a fart creates an infinite number of past galaxies – world hunger – open source – you wish – don’t ask

so are we clear? crystal? oh and get someone to fix the weather

“”

ok cheers – now bugger off – btw satan say hi xxx ooo lol

knock knock [knocking on heaven's door]

“Knock knock.”

“Who’s there?”

“Lucifer.”

“Lucifer who?”

“Oh you are so funny. Lucifer the black sheep.”

“Hey! What brings you here?”

“I’m bored.”

“How are you coping with the light?”

“Shades. You like them.”

“Yeah. Very ooka long bang bang.”

“Where’s your son?”

“Out back I think. You want me to call him?”

“No thanks. Just enquiring.”

“So why are you bored?”

“I think I’m going through a mid-death crisis.”

“It happens to the best of us you know. Remember the ark?”

“When the rains first came?”

“Off day.”

“You get that.”

“Amen.”

“Whatever.”

“So what have you been up to?”

“Oh the usual; roaming the earth and going back and forth on it; back and forth; back and forth.

“Have you been reading the book?”

“Audio streaming.”

“Sounds like fun.”

“That’s not the term I’d use; believe me.”

“Believe you? Now there’s a challenge.”

“I’ll ignore that. So what are you up to?”

“The usual. Creating stuff.”

“Sounds boring.”

“You should try it.”

“I’d rather be crutching sheep.”

“So I’ve heard. And how is that working for you?”

“Better the devil you know.”

dont take anything seriously

dont take anything seriously
dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously
dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously' seriously
dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously' seriously"
   » seriously
dont take 'dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously'
   » seriously" seriously' seriously
dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously"
   » seriously' seriously" seriously' seriously" seriously
seriously

The above can be generated using the following Java code.

public class Seriously {
  public static void main(String[] args) {
    String w[] = { "dont", "take", "anything", "seriously" };
    String sp = " ", q1 = "'", q2 = """, bl = "";
    for (int i=0;i<6;i++) {
      for (int j=i;j>0;j--)
        for (int k=0;k<2;k++)
          System.out.print(w[k]+(k<1?sp:sp+(j%2==0?q1:q2)));
      for (int l=0;l<4;l++)
        System.out.print(w[l]+(l<3?sp:bl));
      for (int m=0;m<i;m++)
        System.out.print((m%2==0?q2:q1)+sp+w[3]);
      System.out.println();
    }
    System.out.println(w[3]);
  }
}

Or equivalently

public class Seriously {
  public static void a(String s) { System.out.print(s); }
  public static void b(String s) { a(s + "n"); }
  public static void main(String[] args) {
    String c[] = { "dont", "take", "anything", "seriously" };
    String d = " ", e = "'", f = """, g = "";
    for (int h=0;h<6;h++) {
      for (int i=h;i>0;i--)
        for (int j=0;j<2;j++)
          a(c[j]+(j<1?d:d+(i%2==0?e:f)));
      for (int k=0;k<4;k++)
        a(c[k]+(k<3?d:g));
      for (int l=0;l<h;l++)
        a((l%2==0?f:e)+d+c[3]);
      b(g);
    }
    b(c[3]);
  }
}

And, with the aid of some universal solvent…

public class Seriously {
  public static void a(String s) { System.out.print(s); }
  public static void b(String s) { a(s + "n"); }
  public static void main(String[] args) {
    String c[] = { "dont", "take", "anything", "seriously" };
    String d = " ", e = "'", f = """, g = "";
    for (int h=0;h<c[(c.length)-d.length()].indexOf("sly");h++) {
      for (int i=h;i>g.length();i--)
        for (int j=0;j<c[(d+e+f).length()].indexOf("rio");j++)
          a(c[j]+(j<d.length()?d:d+(i%"??".length()==g.length()?e:f)));
      for (int k=f.indexOf(f);k<(d+e+e+d).length();k++)
        a(c[k]+(k<(c.length)-f.length()?d:g));
      for (int l=d.indexOf(d);l<h;l++)
        a((l%c.length/(d+e).length()==g.length()?f:e)+d+c[(f+e+d).length()]);
      b(g);
    }
    b(c[c[(c.length+c.length)/c.length].indexOf("thing")]);
  }
}

And so on and so forth…

But it’s probably not worth taking too seriously.

I ching, you ching, ching-aling-aling

I did a cast of I-ching on the shitty crap that i’m encountering, and got this…

https://deoxy.org/iching/23

Relevance to me aside, I could not help but notice how well it described the world.

I’m not a follower per se, but I’m open and curious. One must walk where one is lead. Now the “moving hexagram” to this (the next stage or step on from this reading) is described here.

https://deoxy.org/iching/22

Now I guess that somewhere in between these changes there has to be some stuff, some info, some clues, some techniques, some epiphanies, some serious fun, some crazy glue, something that can hold a future together in spite of a past; stuff that makes you remain hopeful; stops you tredding in shitty mediocrity; being less victim and more hero, less polite and more meaningful, crazy rather than mad; go overboard with semi-colons semi-consciously; taking nothing seriously, making nothing sacred, except everything; 😉

You can save the planet and the whales and the old church steeple
But you can’t save yourself until you save all the people.

Sleepless in the Seattle of his pants…

 

(Originally posted 27 Oct 2008. Altered at whim.)

Just Keep Turning Up

I find the word justice to be contemptible. Perhaps this ramble can explain it…

Suppose you are in love. Perhaps you know them, or perhaps you just know they are out there somewhere. Perhaps you keep turning up. Wherever. But they never show. But you keep turning up. You keep wandering about, fishing for clues, going with your gut. Turning up.

Well that’s life. That is what life is like for all of us. It’s the business of just turning up again.

But then suppose one day you wake up and have an epiphany regarding how unfair this all is. How unjust. And so you stop turning up.

Well that’s justice. It marks the death of a soul and the birth of a victim. If we look back hard enough we can find the places where that die was cast, the first betrayal, the first betrayed. Those clarity-ridden moments when standards got the ok to slip.

And so you change. You think you are owed stuff. You think you’ve had a bad deal. You got parties to blame.

And once you acquire a taste for justice, you becomes something else again, something picky, isolating, patronizing and segregating. Something harsh but fair.

My advice: blame noone, measure noone, just keep turning up.

(Originally posted 23 Dec 2008. Altered at whim.)

Stress Testing Google Translator for Fun and Profit

Life is delicious. How can it not be. With so many opportunities to fail. To stumble at and to topple over. Such variety to embrace, caress, confuse and betray. What a glorious party to be party to. The occasional sweet success. But it is the journey, nothing more, and for always. Yum!

English to French

La vie est délicieux. Comment peut-il ne pas l’être. Avec autant de chances d’échouer. À trébucher et à se renverser. Une telle variété d’embrasser, de caresser, de la confusion et trahir. Quel glorieux partie d’être partie. Le succès occasionnels doux. Mais c’est le voyage, rien de plus, et pour toujours. Yum!

English to French to English

Life is delicious. How can it not be. With so many chances to fail. To stumble and fall over. Such a variety of kissing, fondling, confusion and betrayal. What glorious party to be a party. The success occasional mild. But the trip, nothing more, and forever. Yum!

English to Spanish

La vida es deliciosa. ¿Cómo puede ser que no. Con tantas posibilidades de fracasar. Para tropezar en derrocar y más. Esa variedad a abrazar, acariciar, y confundir a traicionar. ¡Qué glorioso partido que se parte. El dulce éxito ocasional. Pero es el viaje, nada más, y para siempre. Yum!

English to Spanish to English

Life is delicious. How might not. With so many opportunities to fail. To encounter in overthrowing and more. That variety to hug, caress, and confuse betrayal. What glorious party to be a party. The occasional sweet success. But it is the journey, nothing more, and forever. Yum!

English to German

Das Leben ist köstlich. Wie kann es nicht sein. Bei so vielen Möglichkeiten zum Scheitern verurteilt. Um zu stolpern und zu stürzen. Diese Sorte Umarmung, Liebkosung, verwirren und betrügen. Was für eine glorreiche Partei zu Partei. Die gelegentliche süß Erfolg. Aber es ist der Weg, nicht mehr, und für immer. Yum!

English to German to English

Life is delicious. How can it not be. With so many ways to fail. To stumble and fall. This variety hug, caress, confuse and deceive. What a glorious party to party. The occasional sweet success. But it is the way, not more, and forever. Yum!

English to Italian

La vita è delizioso. Come può non essere. Con tante opportunità di fallire. A inciampare e di rovesciare a oltre. Tale varietà di abbracciare, accarezzare, confondere e tradire. Che glorioso partito ad essere parte. Il dolce occasionali successo. Ma è il viaggio, niente di più, e per sempre. Yum!

English to Italian to English

Life is delicious. How can it not be. With so many opportunities to fail. A trip to overthrow and beyond. This sort of embracing, caressing, confuse and betray. What glorious party to be a party. The occasional sweet success. But it is the journey, nothing more, and forever. Yum!

English to Portuguese

A vida é deliciosa. Como pode ser que não. Com tantas possibilidades de fracassar. Para a tropeçar e de derrubar mais. Essa variedade de abraçar, caress, confundir e trair. Que glorioso partido para ser parte no. O sucesso ocasional doce. Mas é a viagem, nada mais, e para sempre. Yum!

English to Portuguese to English

Life is delicious. As you may not. With so many opportunities to fail. To stumble and down more. This variety of embrace, caress, confuse and betray. What glorious party to be a party to. The success occasional sweet. But it is the journey, nothing more, and forever. Yum!

English to Dutch

Life is heerlijk. Hoe kan het niet. Met zoveel kansen te mislukken. Om te struikelen en te omvallen. Dergelijke verscheidenheid te omhelzen, caress, verwarring en verraad. Wat een schitterende partij te zijn partij. De occasionele zoete succes. Maar het is de reis, niets meer, en voor altijd. Yum!

English to Dutch to English

Life is good. How can it not. With so many opportunities to fail. To stumble and fall. Such diversity embracing, caress, confusion and betrayal. What a wonderful party to party. The occasional sweet success. But it is the journey, nothing more, and forever. Yum!

English to Russian

[rendering error: please upgrade to gen-e-sis version 3.1415]

russian: life is delicious

English to Russian to English

Life is delicious. How can it not be. With so many opportunities to fail. To stumble at overthrowing or older. This variety of cover, affection, confuse and deceive. What a glorious party to be a party. In some sweet success. But this way, no more, and always. Yum!

English to Arabic

[rendering error: like the last one]

arabic: life is delicious

English to Arabic to English

Life is delicious. How can it not be. With so many opportunities fail. To falter in more than to topple. This embrace variety, and fondled, and confusion between treason. What a glorious party to be a party. Sometimes sweet success. But the journey is not over, and always told. Yum!

English to Chinese

[rendering error: a pattern emerges]

chinese: life is delicious

English to Chinese to English

Life is delicious. How can we not. There are so many opportunities for failure. Setbacks, and overturned. Embrace such varieties, touching, confusion and betrayal. What a glorious party to the party. Occasionally sweet success. However, it is a journey without more, and always. Yum!

English to Japanese

[rendering error: like whatever]

japanese: life is delicious

English to Japanese to English

Life is delicious. What if it is not possible. Very many opportunities to fail. Stumble and fall out. Such strains hug, caress, confuse and betray. Party, to be no glory. The occasional sweet success. However, it is the journey, nothing from the usual. Yum!

English to Korean

[rendering error: serenity now]

korean: life is delicious

English to Korean to English

Life is delicious. What do you if you do not. There’s so much opportunity to fail. Upset with the practice. Such diversity hug, caress, confused and betrayed. What made the party go to the party. Bittersweet success of the sushi. But it is our journey, and nothing more, and always. Yum!

English to Hindi

[rendering error: feed the poor]

hindi: life is delicious

English to Hindi to English

Life palatable. How this can not be. With many opportunities to fail. In order to topple the offense more. This kind of diversity to embrace, love, betrayed and confused. What the party is a great party. Current success is sweet. But this trip, and some not, and for ever. Yum!

Language is delicious. google translator is delicious. Let’s party. Let’s play. Yum!